Lovin't it and leavin' it, like a Friday night in the Marina district

Well its finally that time. Just like Nelly Furtado and Chris Martin sang so beautifully together, "ah ah aaahhh....why must all good things must come to an end..." that includes my adventures in online dating. On Monday, April 21st, my e-harmony account will be sucked away into our man made black hole. I'm unsure if its like Facebook or Cher but for purposes of this blog its time to sing Kum Ba Yah. I might light a single candle and sing in honor of its memory (a melodramatic ending only seems fit, especially since I am writing the good-bye blog 5 days early).

I'm not sure if I should feel sad, happy or relieved. Sad? I did come out exactly where I started, rolling solo. Happy? I feel like I have enough rejection under my belt that even Brad Pitt could deny me and I'd take it like a champ. Relieved? Mentally, online dating is a challenge. Its like being a promo girl all over again spending two hours trying to connect with every person in the room and hoping they'd buy your product; this time the product is me (may need to take a poll: which one is easier to sell, Fernet or myself). Honestly, your brain gets tired of constantly answering; what do I like to do for fun on the weekend or name your simple pleasure. (Those tend to be a favorite of the stock questions).

With that said, I won't miss the bad questions, awkward first time meet and greets and struggling for things to talk about on the phone but I will miss Phomeo and the random, "I think I saw you on eharmony" sightings.

Where am I now and what's the plan for the future you ask.

I decided, with input from a few friends, that somewhere along the way people lost faith in relationships. If I asked 5 different people what dating meant I could quite possibly get 5 different answers. One person tried to convince me that monogamy doesn't exist anymore, while my other friend called me up to ask if people really do mutli-date on the West Coast. "I heard you assume they are dating at least two other people until you have the talk, is that true?" They both may be on to something, online dating does promote multi-tasking. Even so, whether you met the person online or in person inevitably they will have some baggage from a previous relationship and you need to make a decision how much baggage are you willing to take on. I know good people exist out there but its like going to the Rack; you gotta be prepared to spend your whole day sifting through hideous shirts, skanky skirts and pants that are just plain offensive to find that one amazing $15 Marc Jacob shirt (!!!!!!!)

I will admit I am too lazy to find out whats wrong with the state of marriage and relationships in America (my mom says I need to figure it out before I get married) so I'm passing the torch. I did my own mini-case study but its up to the Karma Queen to research and let me know. I'm taking a step back and if and when people figure out what they want and can actually do it and treat you fair I'll be here. Other than that I must retire the relationship rants and bad dates from this blog, as Nicole says, "the world is my oyster." Makes you crave Hog Island, doesn't it????

Phomeo

The thing I like about San Francisco, and sometimes completely dislike, is even though its a gigantic city, or at least feels that way when you are doing Bay to Breakers, it has a small town feel. This was confirmed today when I received my second message ever on match. The first as you all may remember is the Marine who bitched me out for saying even though I support the armed forces and the United States I prefer not to date a Marine. Moreover a Marine with three kids, from different moms, who assured me, "don't worry none of them live in California." (that part remained in my inner monologue). He claimed I was falsely advertising with my middle of the road politics stance, "you might as well be a Republican!"

So message number two, I will omit his name but not the photo. From henceforth, he shall be known as "Phomeo." (coined by Wayne).




I got all excited, another semi-Phuc sighting! So I e-mailed "Phomeo" to Romeo and Phuc, what I was not expecting was to get this response. "...I actually know that guy..."
Turns out Phomeo works with Phuc!!!

Romeo on the otherhand said:

[12:15] Romeo: hmm?
[12:16] Romeo: he seems like a nice guy
[12:16] Romeo: is he your type
[12:16] Me: are you and Phuc my type?
[12:16] Romeo: i dunno about phuc. am i?
[12:17] Romeo: i am funny, educated, down to earth, i have a big family, am good with dogs and making fun of cats, love 80s movies, watch cartoons, can drive a stick shift, hip-hop karaoke and am a certified raptologist.

He's sending me his credentials later tonight.

In my attempt to be honest I still managed to say the dreaded, "You're not my type because you are my friend." Even if its true, I suppose its not what a man or woman wants to hear.

I have yet to decide how I will proceed. Phuc was going with respond back, meet up and then randomly show up at one of his work happy hours with Phuc. I was thinking of responding with you look like my friend Phuc and may actually work with him too. And then add, "Phomeo, I think you're great, lets be friends and go play tennis." I don't date coworkers or friend's coworkers anymore. Gets too complicated, attempting to enlarge the circle not shrink, hopefully he'll understand.